March IWSG: When does a 'break' become 'procrastination'?

Welcome back to the Insecure Writer's Support Group - a monthly blog hop where writers across the internet get together to share their insecurities and encourage each other to keep going. The IWSG was set up by the fantastic Alex. J. Cavanaugh, and you can check out the official website/sign-up list here!

If you've been following my blog for a while, you've probably guessed that I've been taking somewhat of an extended vacation from any serious writing. Yes, I've been working on a new fantasy project, but it has nothing to do with the sequel for the book that I've actually published (Synthetica).

I went to Oxford to meet up with my uni friends last weekend, and they all wanted to know if I'd finished book two, when it would be out, how the writing was going etc etc. And although it was lovely to know that they were rooting for me, I was kind of embarrassed to admit that, well, there isn't a book two - yet.

It made me realise that I can't keep putting it off forever. And although I keep telling myself that I 'deserve a break' and that 'writing something new will keep my writing fresh', the fact is, is that I'm just having a very very long procrastination period. Synthetica came out nearly a year ago - it's high time the sequel came out too.

But then that decision comes with it's own set of insecurities and issues: what if this book is awful? What if it makes no sense? What if I can't write another book?

All my life I've had a serious issue with starting things, losing interest and then dropping them before moving onto the next shiny thing that catches my attention. I told myself that if I published Synthetica, that that wouldn't happen, but I have a horrible feeling that it might. How do you get back into the rhythm of writing a book/series that you haven't even looked at for about six months? How do you recapture that passion and enthusiasm you had the first time around? I genuinely don't know if I can do it....but I'm going to give it my damn best all the same.

How do you start to write a series/book that you've left for a long time? How do you 'recapture the magic'? Or is there no magic? What are your insecurities this month?

November IWSG: Getting over the (random) fear...

This blog post probably would've been more appropriate for Halloween, but seeing as how that was less than a week ago, I'm going to use it anyway ;).

It's that time of the month again, when insecure writers from all over the internet unite and blog about their deepest, darkest fears that have been plaguing them for the last month. Special thanks go out to Alex J. Cavanaugh for setting up the group, and a huge thank you to all of this month's co-hosts :)!

Although I'm not officially participating in NaNowriMo this year, I'm currently in the rewriting stage of my first draft, and my Other Half has given me the deadline of the 30th November to get it done - so in a way, I'm with all you brave NaNoWriMos out there, at least in spirit.

But here's the thing - I'm STILL struggling to get my mojo together to get into my rewrites properly. It's not because I don't know what I want to do, or that I hate my story (actually, I've felt more hopeful about this novel in the last few weeks than I have done for a while) - it's something else, and I only managed to put my finger on it last night.

I'm scared of succeeding.

I know, I know how odd that sounds - but the fact is, writing a novel is something I've been working towards since I was about 15. And the thought that by the end of this month my novel should (theoretically) be in a readable form (i.e. I could send it out to my beta readers if I wanted to) really does scare me. Do I have the dedication and motivation to actually finish something for once? After so many false starts and disappointments, I find it hard to believe. It's almost as though my subconscious is telling me that no, I can't do this, I can't actually realise one of my life dreams, heaven forbid - so why bother working on it?

So that's it for this month - a slightly odd topic, I know, but it's been bothering me for the last few days. Hopefully it'll pass soon - only 25 days to go until the finish line!

Happy bonfire night, everyone! Stay safe out there tonight!

'Thyme' to get busy...

...oh come on, it wasn't that bad was it? I'm actually quite proud I thought of that all by myself!(...this is what happens when you're left on your own for the day in the summer heat...)

Bad puns aside, please bear with me as it does have a point!

So I went back up t'north last week to visit my parents, and it was great to get away from everything and just relax and enjoy looking after the cows/calves/other farm animals for a while (in case you're wondering, yes, my parents do actually live on a farm - I'm not crazy, honest...)

Anyway, while I was there I couldn't help noticing my dad's vegetable patch. The last time I saw it at Easter, he'd just begun to put the seeds in...now, well, it looks amazing! There's rows of green beans, peas, carrots, lettuce, beetroot, tomatoes....we had the honour of eating some of the beans (in a soup) and the lettuce (actually, most of the lettuce) and everything tasted fantastic!

This got me thinking. I have 5 weeks left of my summer holidays and I am the worst person to just sit around doing nothing (in all seriousness, having nothing to do does have a negative impact on my mental health - it takes me back to when I wasn't in such a good place, and well, I won't bore you now, but it is healthier for me if my mind is kept occupied) - so I thought, hey, why don't I do that! Unfortunately, I know exactly what kind of person I am, and I'm the kind of person who gets all excited about an idea (much like my writing), starts it, then loses interest (exactly like my writing).

So I came up with a compromise. My project for this summer is going to be starting my own herb garden. Smaller, easier to manage and you still get some delicious home grown produce out of it! At this point I'm going to chose to ignore the fact that every plant I've tried to grow up to now has died....not through neglect, just through me not having the green fingers necessary to keep them alive.

Luckily for me, the Other Half tends to go along with my whims (not that he has much choice, bless him), so yesterday we went out and bought a planter and some compost (I'd already bought my seeds for 30p from Wilkos the previous day).

And today, this is what they look like!

On the left I've planted some parsley, in the middle is garlic chives and on the right is basil! Okay, so I know it's not much to look at right now (not that that has stopped me from obsessively checking them every half an hour...) - but I'll keep you updated on it's progress :)

Oh, and here's another little something we picked up yesterday too - pretty cool, huh?

So now that that distraction is out of the way...back to writing it is!

Happy holidays!

July IWSG: Procrastination station

Welcome to this month's Insecure Writer's Support Group!

IWSG was set up by the fantastic Alex J. Cavanaugh (you can view his blog here) and the group now was it's own awesome website here. Go and check them both out, now! Or y'know, once you've finished here ;)

I know, I know, I'm a day early, but if I thought that if I posted now, I'd have time to actually take a look around all the other brilliant writing blogs out there tomorrow, and offer some encouragement to all you other lovely writers!

I don't actually have anything specific to blog about this month, but I thought I'd share something interesting I've discovered about myself this month anyway.

So, for the past few weeks I've been working on my novel idea, and I'm pretty excited about this one. For once, I don't find it hard to write – I'm simply enjoying the process of writing it. But I have noticed one thing – if for whatever reason, I don't get to work on it for a day or two, I do find it much harder to get back into the swing of writing when I do open it back up again. I procrastinate like crazy...and yet, when I do finally get to work on it again, I don't want to stop!

I guess it's like any hobby you do – when I started learning guitar, I remember my guitar teacher telling me to keep my guitar out somewhere where I'd see it, so I'd pick it up, and practice more. At first, I didn't believe him but I soon learnt that, actually, it was true – if my guitar was out on display, I was much more likely to pick up and strum away than if I'd had to get it out of it's case every day.

And I think the same applies for my novel. So instead of just having it on my computer, and procrastinating whenever I think about loading it up, this month I'm going to be thinking of ways to keep it 'out in the open' – whether that's blogging more about my progress, never shutting down my computer, starting a notebook with all my notes about the novel in (this is actually my first novel that I haven't done this for), or just listening to music and thinking about ideas for the next scene – I'm determined to keep this novel visible, so I don't forget about it, even for a day.

How about you? How do you keep writing instead of procrastinating? And I'd love to hear if any of you are working on something that you're so enthusiastic about too :)!

Happy writing!